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1 Timothy 1:15
“Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.”
What a boring verse. And how sad that it is so boring. How adverse that this hackneyed set of words has been so deeply ingrained in the wax in my ears that I’ve heard it, read it, glossed over, passed it off for years, and have moved on without feeling the slightest twinge of its meaning.
That is, until I hear it in a moment when I’m cognizant of how utterly sinful I am. Till I see my mistakes… till I see my rank appetites… till I see how much I’ve messed up… until I see how much one little move has led to the next little move, till all the moves look much more like one big move away from God and the whole Christian world.
It’s dark and lonely in my life when I’m pretending to be what I’m not.
Christ came into the world not to save pretenders – not to save the righteous – not to save the pleasant – not to save the holy – not to save the perfect – not to save the people who pray eloquent prayers, quote reams of verses, and read John Piper’s books. (No offense to John Piper; I read his books).
He came to save sinners. And I need that. Seriously need that.
And look how Paul sets up the statement. It’s almost like he knows that the most important words he would ever pen might one day also be hijacked by overuse until they also became the most boring. This is why he’s so careful to qualify it: Here’s a statement you can trust; here’s a statement that’s worth accepting; here’s a statement worth adopting into your economy of thought; here’s a statement worth devouring, worth living, worth setting up as the precursor to all your other thoughts, actions, and beliefs; here’s a statement that deserves full acceptance:
“Christ Jesus came… into the world…. to save… sinners”
And just in case, for some reason, you felt yourself exempt from this sentence, Paul adds on an adjective clause: “of whom I am the worst.”
Here’s what I’ve learned – I first need to foster in myself a willingness to be able to admit that I’m a sinner. And not to simply admit it in the theologically sound way we so easily do at Bible studies when we need to make a point. But to actually live this truth… humbly… I am a sinner.
And before I burrow my way into a dark hole, in which I think only of my self as a sinner, I need to “fully accept” the bliss of this heavenly thought: Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners… of whom I am the worst.
I was trying to imagine what my life would be like without the Holy Spirit. Would I desire to pursue God? Would I even try? Could I even try? Would I worship? Would I walk in holiness? Would I have the strength to resist my own fleshy inclinations to sin?
If I may speak honestly (and you’re allowed to have a different answer than me) I would have to admit that I don’t think I’d be very good at any of these things were it not for the tenacious presence of the Holy Spirit.
In my slow march through the gospel of John, I came across this brief passage that reminds us of the role of the Holy Spirit, and I paused to think about how much I need him in all the areas of my life I’ve never been able to manage.
John 16:5-11
“Now I am going to him who sent me, yet none of you asks me, ‘Where are you going?’ Because I have said these things, you are filled with grief. But I tell you the truth: It is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you. When he comes, he will convict the world of guilt in regard to sin and righteousness and judgment: in regard to sin, because men do not believe in me; in regard to righteousness, because I am going to the Father, where you can see me no longer; and in regard to judgment, because the prince of this world now stands condemned.”
The passage is extremely rich and there are so many things I’d love to write about but the single point I want to pay attention to at the moment is the role of the Holy Spirit; “he will convict the world of guilt in regard to sin, righteousness, and judgment.”
If there is one thing I’ve learned in the past month (which has been a month of sprinting through a busy life on my own strength) it is this: I do not have an ability to resist sin, pursue righteousness, and comprehend or appreciate the judgment of God. I need the Spirit. I need his presence. I need his conviction.
Unless I live in him, in awareness of him, in seeking him, in following him, then the overwhelming appetites of my flesh will lead me easily into sin. If I do not have his direction, his strength, or the memory of the scriptures he brings to my mind, then it’s unlikely that I’ll even think about living righteously.
I need the Spirit.
